Do you golf like this golfer? Do you swear at the ball?
Question: Do you golf like this golfer? Do you swear at the ball?
True Confessions of a Golfer
A man goes to the confessional. “Forgive me, Father, for I
have sinned.”
“What is your sin, my child?” the priest asks.
“Well,” the man starts, “I used some horrible language this
week, and I feel absolutely terrible.”
“When did you do use this awful language?” asks the priest.
“I was golfing and hit an incredible drive that looked like
it was going to go over 250 yards, but it struck a phone
line that was hanging over the fairway and fell straight
down to the ground after going only about 100 yards.”
“Is that when you swore?”
“No, Father,” replies the man. “After that, a squirrel ran
out of the bushes and grabbed my ball in his mouth and began
to run away.”
“Is THAT when you swore?” asks the priest again.
“Well, no,” says the man. “You see, as the squirrel was
running, an eagle came down out of the sky, grabbed the
squirrel in his talons, and began to fly away!”
“Is THAT when you swore?” asks the amazed priest.
“No, not yet,” the man replies. “As the eagle carried the
squirrel away in his claws, it flew toward the green. And as
it passed over a bit of forest near the green, the squirrel
dropped my ball.”
“Did you swear THEN?” asks the now impatient priest.
“No, because as the ball fell, it struck a tree, bounced
through some bushes, careened off a big rock, and rolled
through a sand trap onto the green and stopped within six
inches of the hole.”
“You missed the putt, didn’t you?” sighs the priest.
Answer:
Answer by Lexi
hahaha
John Gallagher Cack-Handed Professional Golfer – Episode #17
In this episode for www.HomeofGolf.TV I visit Scottish professional golfer John Gallagher at Swanston Golf Club, just South of Edinburgh. He is unique in that he plays cack-handed (cross handed), meaning for a right handed golfer his right hand is above his left one. Watch the video to see this self taught method in action and how we may all be gripping the golf club the wrong way! John currently plays on the EuroPro Tour, though successful qualification in the final stage ( top 35 and ties over 54 holes from 16-18th Nov) of the Alps Tour this week will mean a full schedule next year playing in Austria, Belguim, France, Italy, Morocco, Spain and Slovenia. John has been a professional for 9 months, following a successful amateur career including winning the 2007 Scottish Amateur Championship at Prestwick Golf Club, where he beat Keir McNicoll in the final 4&3. Prior to this in 2005 he reached the final of the 2005 Amateur Championship at Royal Birkdale, beating Lloyd Saltman in the semi-final. John is sponsored by Swanston Golf Club www.Swanstongolf.com Ping Golf (equipment) http Bunker Mentality (clothing) www.Bunker-Mentality.com Morisons Solicitors http He is is very grateful for their financial assistance and support, along with other private individuals. This certainly alleviates some of the stress of being on tour and allows him to concentrate more on his game. John and everyone at Swanston Golf Club made me feel very welcome and I wish him and the club every success …
Read MoreFirst Time Golfer Is Introduced to BirdieBall® and StrikePad®
www.birdieball.com BirdieBall is the limited flight practice golf ball that you can hit anywhere. Traveling a maximum of forty yards this practice g BirdieBall is the limited flight practice golf ball that you can hit anywhere. Traveling a maximum of forty yards this practice golf ball can be used at home, the park, the office, the softball field or even in a gymnasium. In this video a first time golfer is introduced to the BirdieBall the StrikePad, Velocity Tee and ShagStick. With these products it is fun and easy to practice golf anywhere.
Read MoreAn American golfer (joke)?
Question: An American golfer (joke)?
An American golfer playing in Ireland hooked his drive into the woods. Looking for his ball, he found
a little Leprechaun flat on his back, a big bump on his head and the golfer’s ball beside him.
Horrified, the golfer got his water bottle from the cart and poured it over the little guy, reviving him.
“Arrgh! What happened?” the Leprechaun asked.
“I’m afraid I hit you with my golf ball,” the golfer says.
“Oh, I see. Well, ye got me fair and square. Ye get three wishes, so whaddya want?”
“Thank God, you’re all right!” the golfer answers in relief. “I don’t want anything, I’m just glad you’re OK, and I apologize.” And the golfer walks off.
“What a nice guy,” the Leprechaun says to himself. I have to do something for him. I’ll give him the three things I would want… a great golf game, all the money he ever needs, and a fantastic sex life.”
A year goes by (as it does in stories like this) and the American golfer is back. On the same hole, he again hits a bad drive into the woods;
and the Leprechaun is there waiting for him.
“Twas me that made ye hit the ball here,” the little guy says. “I just want to ask ye, how’s yer golf game?”
“My game is fantastic!” the golfer answers. I’m an internationally famous golfer now.” He adds, “By the way, it’s good to see you’re all right.”
“Oh, I’m fine now, thank ye. I did that fer yer golf game, you know. And tell me, how’s yer money situation?”
“Why, it’s just wonderful!” the golfer states. “When I need cash, I just reach in my pocket and pull out
$ 100.00 bills I didn’t even know were there!”
“I did that fer ye also. And tell me, how’s yer sex life?”
The golfer blushes, turns his head away in embarrassment, and says shyly, “It’s OK.”
“C’mon, c’mon now,” urged the Leprechaun, “I’m wanting to know if I did a good job. How many times a week?”
Blushing even more, the golfer looks around then whispers, “Once, sometimes twice a week.”
“What??” responds the Leprechaun in shock. “That’s all? Only once or twice a week?”
“Well,” says the golfer, “I figure that’s not bad for a priest in a small parish.”
COMMENT: I think this joke needs a little more zing to it, but oh well….
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If this post is ever deleted, you may still find it here along with all my other posts:
http://chu.gs/jokes
If this accounts is ever deleted. Here’s Bebop version 6 just to be safe.
http://answers.yahoo.com/my/profile;_ylt=AhKcDnGVH4.WDD2qkvSRMnvsy6IX;_ylv=3?show=imNk94Qkaa
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@natasha B
there’s a guy who calls himself max power and uses the simpsons avatars, he was my troll. Yahoo’s recent update seems to have helped quite a bit.
Answer:
Answer by msmamato3
Lol, I thought it was cute and it made me laugh!
Are “Aspire” golf clubs “ok” for beginning woman golfer?
Question: Are “Aspire” golf clubs “ok” for beginning woman golfer?
I just bought a full set of Ladies Left Handed “Aspire” golf clubs on Ebay… I’m well aware of golf brands and know that they are not “elite” by any means…. I just want to learn the sport and see how things go before I make a big investment. I would have borrowed but I need ladies left handed clubs and no one I know has them. Would you think these clubs are sufficient for that purpose?
Answer:
Answer by Chase R
ofcouse